In this world, time pass by so fast. No time to breathe, no time to relax. Everyday is a battlefield, especially if you’re a being called human. Given the heavy responsibility to suffer deeply, understand the complicated, fear the happiness… Ugh. Being born in this rotten big ball is a curse.
I am a dancer in Prontera, though I keep it secret... I am known as a rogue who mostly stays in the Payon cave. I had no choice... I needed money badly…. They said money is the root of all evil, so am I living in evil? I didn’t really know and I really didn’t give a damn what the others think. I was an introvert. Yes, an introvert. You may wonder how an introvert became a dancer… Well, yes… I was shy; actually, I AM shy… I don’t feel good with people looking at me at first. As they said, “There’s always that first time, right? And when you gotten used to it, it doesn’t matter anymore.”
I call myself an introvert because I don’t communicate at all with anyone… I get all shy up when someone compliments me like a goddess or I just have inferiority complex. They say I am a kid, a little girl. What the hell do they know!? Did they suffer how I had suffered in my life!? Do they know the true meaning of hell? NO. So they better shut the f*** up. If they were in my place, they would have been dead, dead of a case of suicide because no one can take this unbearable pain.
You see, if I was to describe it right now… It would never fit a million words the pain I am enduring. My father, an exorcist, was a f***ing senseless b@st@rd!! He let my mom, who so much love him, be harassed by any men for a price of money. My mom doesn’t complain at all. When I rebelled to dad, my mom slapped me to silence me. “You do not understand,” she always says.
“What don’t I understand!!??” I said, shouting, “You’re… you’re like a PROSTITUTE!!” she simply smiled at me. My brain and logic was killing me, “What is it!!?? WHAT DON’T I GET IN THIS PICTURE!!” I asked myself a lot of times.
Dad would sometimes beat the heck out of mom. I learned to despise men. All they did was have fun with my mom, not caring how horrible she felt… And my dad, the b*tch! Oh, how hate grew more and more everyday in my life for male species. I wanted to stab them all, kill them all, and make them suffer.
Soon, mom died of a disease because of so much harassment. My dad look upon me and said I was next. Fear and anger flare up on me. Mom told me that one of Gaia’s laws was to obey your parents at all cost. He makes me sick. “You are where you are today because of me,” he smirked, “So you will obey at all cost!”
I tried to obey, because I know that it’ll make mom happy. As soon as 3 guys came looking for me, I let out my katar and killed the 3 priest. My dad went furious! He was coming to kill me! He held that huge bastard sword in his hand and pressed my neck hard, crunching it. “You idiot! You’re like your mother, useless!!!” He threw me in a huge mirror in the house. Many pieces of glasses fell on the floor. I could hear him swinging that old rusted sword, but I couldn’t stand up, my arm felt heavy. As I look at it, I was right. A piece of mirror has pierced through my 10 year old body. As soon as the footsteps became louder, I grabbed a piece of mirror. It made my hand bleed as I continue holding on it tightly.
As soon as I was raised up again by my neck, I knew he was going to slash me. Quickly, my instincts instantly reacted hitting the piece of mirror in my hand through his head. I fell again at the small sharp pieces of glasses in my back and a yell out for pain.
Horrible? You ain’t seen nothing yet. That’s not even the beginning of my pain. Don’t want to read anymore? I thought so too. You’re a loser and so are the other people of this world, quickly judging a person. To you I might appear as an innocent child, but to hell, I might appear as someone not acting on any pain. I experience nothing but pain and suffering in this stinking world. And you’re just one lucky reader, aren’t you? Be careful, ‘cause I wanna kill people like you, so annoying, so happy…
..TO BE CONTINUED..
